Xavy & Mom

Single Mom Survival: Week of Self-Sabotage Life as a single parent often feels like juggling flaming torches while riding a unicycle. As an introvert (and a classic INTJ!), my default mode is analysis and planning, trying to make sense of the beautiful chaos that is raising my 12-year-old son, Xavy, working two IT jobs, and managing my furry companions – one very clever Belgian Malinois and one equally adorable Shih Tzu. Amidst this balancing act, someone recently asked me a

Single Mom Survival: Week of Self-Sabotage Life here in sunny Dumaguete has its own rhythm, a mix of the daily grind, the joys (and occasional dramas) of raising my 12-year-old, Xavy, and the delightful chaos brought by my two very opinionated dogs – a sharp Belgian Malinois and a sweet little Shih Tzu. As an INTJ-A introvert also juggling a full-time job and an online IT gig, downtime can feel like a precious, almost mythical creature. So, the question that’s

Single Mom Survival: Week of Self-Sabotage I can pinpoint several moments when that nasty little seed of self-doubt first took root. That job interview I was so sure I aced, only to receive the polite rejection email. The elaborate cake I attempted for Xavy’s birthday that ended up looking like a leaning tower of frosting. That expensive certification I studied tirelessly for, only to see the dreaded “Fail” on the screen. Each of those moments chipped away at my confidence.

Single Mom Survival: Week of Self-Sabotage Ah, self-sabotage in its most… domestic form. The question is, what’s the most memorable or epic way I’ve sabotaged myself? For me, it’s not some dramatic, life-altering event. It’s the slow, steady erosion of interest. My superpower seems to be starting things with gusto and then… poof! My focus vanishes like Xavy’s Halloween candy stash. The most memorable example? Those darn curtains. I got this brilliant idea to sew new curtains for house in

Single Mom Survival: Week of Self-Sabotage Happy hump day! Today, I wanted to touch on a different kind of self-sabotage – or is it actually self-preservation in disguise? The question was: Have I ever walked away from something I really wanted? The answer is a resounding YES, several times. The example that immediately springs to mind is the Apple Store. Oh, those shiny gadgets! That latest iPhone, the sleekest iPad… my tech-loving heart does a little flutter every time. There

Single Mom Survival: Week of Self-Sabotage So, yesterday was about the hesitation that creeps in when we start something new. Today, let’s dive into what happens after – when things inevitably go sideways, or when we just plain make a mistake. Ah, the perfect playground for our inner critic! For me, when I mess up – say, I forget a deadline for one of my jobs (cue mini-heart attack) or I totally burn dinner (again!) – my internal dialogue can

Single Mom Survival: Week of Self-Sabotage It’s Monday, and let’s be real, Mondays can feel like a fresh start… or a fresh pile of laundry, depending on how you look at it. This week, I wanted to reflect about something I think we all wrestle with: self-sabotage. Yep, that sneaky little voice in our heads that seems determined to trip us up, especially when we’re trying something new. For me, starting something new – whether it’s picking up an extra

Dancing in the Dark: A Week in the Life The one thing I’m putting off because I’m not sure how it will turn out is migrating to Australia. My older sister, her husband, and kids moved there back in 2010, and she’s been my biggest cheerleader, constantly urging me to join them. She paints this beautiful picture of a better life, more opportunities for Xavy, and a support system that would ease my burdens. Logically, it makes sense. Financially, she’s

Dancing in the Dark: A Week in the Life You know, it’s interesting. At work, there have been several times when big decisions were made, and I wasn’t privy to all the details. Maybe there were restructuring plans I wasn’t informed about, or confidential discussions about a new menu. Honestly? Most of the time, it didn’t bother me. I truly believe you don’t need to know every single thing happening around you. Of course, if it’s something that directly impacts